Saturday, December 29, 2012

WS: D/S Relationships

"I'm in charge!" "NO! I'M IN CHARGE!!"


I read a lot..AAAA LOOOOTTT of supernatural/paranormal fiction, and one of my largest deal breakers when it comes to choosing a story is the portrayal of Dominant and Submissive relationships.

Now, don't get me wrong I love me a good story and i'm open minded to different portrayals of this dynamic, but my problem stems from specifically Shifters (Were-animals) and Vampire portrayals.

For these two character types, D/S relationships are almost gaurenteed to be a large part of the story.
It's always the same old, same old.

Shifters:
The shifter is almost always larger then the human and an Alpha and/or a Dominent, and in this case is almost always a wolf/dragon or other large breed predator.
If the shifter is smaller than the human then the human takes on the Dominant arch type while the shifter is an omega or runt of the litter, or otherwise submissive breed of "pet" like animal.
Or in the case of two shifter the larger is an Alpha and/or dominant while the smaller is an omega or generally submissive "breed", like a house cat.

AND EVERY TIME a shifter finds their mate they are overcome with the desire to have sex with said mate immediatly regardless of location. "But they're soulmate!" "It's animal instinct!" Uh, animals don't actually behave like that unless the female is in heat, humans don't normally go into heat..so it's kinda completely inaccurate.

Vampires:
when a vampire is paired with a non vampire the vampire is almost always a Master Vampire of sometype, and take the Dominant role.
when the vampire is paired with another vampire the older vampire is normally the Dominant while the younger is submissive due to either having been "sired" by the other or because of inherent submissive personality caused by some kind of issue instead of actually being a natural submissive. Can't claim natural submissiveness if you've been turned into a magical creature.

Also the vampire is at the minnimum 2x the age of a they're "partner" when Dominant, while submissives are often newly turned or significantly younger than they're Dominant.

 ****

Portrayals of other supernatural/paranormal creatures often follow a similar patern if you take into account that any hybrid of human and animal normally follows the shifter example, while and imortal diety not associated with an animal, any type of fey, as well as most human magic users, follow the vampire example.

It becomes a bit tedious. I encourage writers to switch it up. There's more to D/S relationships then is exampled in most of the works i read, a lot of which are mainstream.

And lest it be overlooked during this post, there is more to Supernatural/Paranormal Creatures than D/S relatioships. Especially for Vampire and Shifters.

Get some new material.

Smooches!

******EDIT 12/31******

Just finished reading two books in a series about Werewolves and it recalled to mind a topic of D/S relationships in these genres that i find supper irritating because of its stereotypical-ness.

It's the fact that  Dominant partners are NEVER inclined to assume receptive roles during sexual situations. While submissive partners NEVER  required or seem interested in taking on active roles.

This, I've found is most common in M/M romance of this genre where the Dominant partner never bottoms because the authors and perhaps the readers infer that bottoming means you are less Dominant or perhaps more vulnerable.


When switched to M/F romance the female character if Dominant often engages in sexual activity from a "girl on top" postion, While the male dominant character i portrayed the same as in M/M romance.

I've found though that close examintation of the characters actions reveal that a character portrayed is Dominant in these circumstances is often Controlling and protective (paranoid) outside the bedroom while in the bedroom they are demanding, BUT not focused on their own pleasure to the point that sexual activity is often entirely in the hands of the Submissive partner who does absolutly nothing but recieve attention.

Some of you may ask, "But isn't that what D/S relationships are?".

To that i say, Dominant partners can be controling and are often intiator the when it comes to sexual activity, however, the Dominant partners role at it's basis is to have thier needs/desires fulfilled by the submissive partner. The submissive partners role is to fulfill the needs/desires of the Dominant partner, most often recieving pleasure from pleasing their partner.
A "submissive" partner who lies back and does nothing but give them selves over to the "dominant" partner, who in turn works dilligently to provide said "submissive" with pleasure, is not actually taking a submissive role, but is in fact taking on a Dominant role. While the "Dominant" is taking on the role of submissive by focusing on fulfilling their partners needs and placing those above their own.

This can be identified also in the often seen example of the "Dominant" who is abusive or does not acknowledge their relationship with their "submissive", and then when the "submissive" has met someone else (a rival), or the the couple has borken up or been seperated with or without the "dominant" fighting to maintain the relationship.
Under these circumstances you find that the "Dominant" partner becomes obssessed with the "Submissive" partner often to the degree of not taking care of themselves, becoming depressed or suffering mood swings even while maintaing a denial that they don't actually want to be with the "submissive" while the "submissive" often is saddened but soon becomes angry and begins to move on with their life rather quickly while rembering their "dominant" fondly.
If you switch the Dominant and submissive labels in the previous two paragraphs the fact that the story still make sense if not more sense shows that the author hasn't taken into account the personalities of Dominants and  Submissive.

I should say however that not all Real Life dominant and Submissives behave in the same ways. Some may follow the examples i've described while some may not, however i should point out that the MAJORITY of D/S relationships in romance today follow only the one path painting a singularly monochromatic landscape in regards to D/S relationships while at the same time misrepresenting a lot of the things which label D/S relationships as D/S relations.

KK that's all for now. ^_^

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Happy Holidays!

So i had a very nice equinox on the 22nd. The first time in a while i actually remembered to celebrate on the correct day. It's been a wonderfull Yule as well. ^_^
Watched "The Preachers Wife" and "The Nightmare Before Christmas" yesterday with my mom, which was nice.

Taking the time to relax as much as i can during this time in preperation for the excitement of next year, so i haven't really been recording or writing to much. i haven't been playing WOW either.

Anywasys, i think somemore about working on my blog a bit and i might try to badger my mother into writing a piece for my "Writing Supernaturals" series, or maybe something else.

kk Smooches!!

Friday, December 7, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving.
^_^
It's been about 2 weeks since my last post, so i thought i'd stop by.

I haven't been playing WoW (although I'm still paying for it every month) since my mom hasn't been playing and i'm a bit over playing panderia even though i haven't even gotten past the starting area, since i kinda worked myself into a corner with my alts.

I haven't been working on any of my books, since i've been a bit preoccupied with other RL things like being crazy. lol

I've been recording a bit, but i haven't done anything i think i'd want to release.

I might be moving soon and going back to school so i've been thinking a lot about that, tho.

Anywasy, i'll be stopping in again soon.

TTYL!